Sunday 20 May 2007

One of my Weaknesses.....

..... and yes there are many!!! At least I can admit that lmao.

I read something tonight which instantly hit a nerve.... it was the term 'Welfare Mum'. It wasn't so much the words as they stand alone, but more the connotation that came with them... it's always the same ~ negative. My reaction is always the same too ~ frustration at the stereotyping!!

For me, I suppose it means that I have chosen (as I have mentioned on here previously) to raise my child MYSELF and try to provide her with what I feel is the most important thing any child can have ~ a loving, constant environment in which she thrives. Why then, do I feel guilty when I read those 2 words strung together in a negative light? I shouldn't, I don't want to but I do.

It's funny. I believe that the formative years are the most important in a child's development. I believe that if a child is happy and confident they are more likely to grow into happy, independant adults who rely less on the government for money. I know that in 2, 5, 10 years down the track, I will not regret being a 'Welfare Mum', as I will know I was there for my girl when she needed me most. In addition, I will be paying it all back in taxes when I start work again next year (and my Mum has paid enough taxes for me to be on Welfare for at least another year :P)!!!! Even so, many make 'Welfare Mums' feel guilty for the choices we make for our kids. We love our kids as much as parents with money!!! Sure, there are some of 'us' who could do better, but there are also some working parents that could improve.

OK ~ I have released now and I feel better for it!!!!

5 comments:

Rachael said...

I agree. I think using the words 'Welfare Mum' in a negative way is assuming all single Mothers receiving a payment from the government to stay at home and care for their children all share negative mindsets!! A big generalisation. Anyone of us who are not single and are caring for our kids full time, or maybe even working part time because we have a partner, and the option, could (god forbid) lose their partner or have their partner leave the relationship and be faced to make the same decision. Either leave their child for someone else to care for full time, or stay home with their child and sacrafice having extra money to be there for them until they start school. We have to be so careful not to judge.

Vanessa x said...

I suppose I just have to focus on what I know and that is that Kara is loved and cared for as much as a child in a wealthy/nuclear family would be!!

I also wanted to add that this post was not prompted because of one single article/blog I read ~ it recurs over and over and over again. It's just a soft spot for me at the moment given what we are currently going through, hence the post.

Anonymous said...

We all know you were having a go at Sheye which is low even for you and its a bit late to backtrack now.

Vanessa x said...

No ~ you THINK you know what is going on in my mind but you have absolutely no idea. Perhaps you should just stop visiting my blog ~ I am keeping away from people that cause me pain/frustration/saddness and maybe you should do the same.

This was not about Sheye at all and I have told her that. If you read as many blogs/forums etc as I do, perhaps you will find the few pages which infuriated me most!

Leave me alone and let me get on with my life.

Tan said...

'Anonymous' I don't know who you think you are to leave such nasty, horrid posts on someone's blog. You obviously have no idea what you are talking about.... Go away and find something constructive to do!